Facebook? Checked.
TV? Checked.
Photo booth? Checked.
Book? Checked.
Classical music? Checked.

Yet I still can't fall asleep.

Don't think I'll be able to wake up on time to meet Bc later lol.
I apologize first. In case :D

And no, I didn't break up with Ben. He's just off to Malaysia for his massage with 'special ending' and to ogle at the Macau girl. He'll be back in SG today.



While I stone in this sleepless night, I gave my past a thought. And maybe I didn't really love him as much as I thought I did. The reason why I was so affected and upset was... maybe I just wasn't used to rejection. I'm not used to rejection about something that meant so much to me. Because he meant that much, and he forsaken it. Or perhaps I was too used to getting everything I wanted, or everyone I wanted. They were all too easy... But you were not. You got me thinking about my flaws, got me so obsessed. And before I could realize how deep in I was, you ended everything. And now I think back, damn I was stupid. No, I wasn't stupid to have fell for you then because everything you did was too sweet to resist. But stupid to have thought that something about me was the reason why you didn't turn back. I was that dumb girl who went around asking people what the fuck was wrong with me, and what did you not like about me. But no. There's nothing wrong with me at all, because the one with all the problems was you. I looked at all your photos and told myself that I loved you. It's the first time I really wanted something so unimaginably badly, and didn't get it.

But it's okay. Because no matter where I am, there will always be someone who loves me for who I am, be it my mother or Ben.

Times have changed.